Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko!
by ObiOtaku16
Summary: Chaos emerges as a young man appears at the Masaki House claiming that Ryoko is his ma! Who is the father? It's not Tenchi... ON HAITUS
1. Typical Tenchi Muyo Morning

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
  
I don't own Tenchi Muyo or any Dragonball Z characters at all that will soon to be mentioned or even appear. I only own my character Ryu Hakubi just to let y'all know.  
  
Ch.1-Typical Tenchi Muyo Morning  
  
"How dare you put your hands on Lord Tenchi Ryoko!?" Ayeka yelled as the sounds of explosions and other things breaking emerged from the silence of dawn. It was a typical chaotic start to the morning in the life of Tenchi Masaki who of course has to deal with 6 lovely yet insane women living with him since they came from outer space.  
  
"Will you guys stop it already?" Tenchi pleaded as he witnessed the everyday destruction of his 3-story house that his dad built. "You have to choose between us Tenchi!" Ryoko said to the young man as she latched onto one of his arms. Ayeka's narrowed in anger, as she latched onto Tenchi's other arm. "Let go!" "Never!" Ryoko sneered, playing a game of tug-or-war with the princess using Tenchi as rope.  
  
Sasami hummed as she started cooking dinner with Ryo- ohki chowing down on carrots in the kitchen, and Kiyone was yelling at Mihoshi to get up because they needed to get to work patrolling the Milky Way galaxy. They did their everyday activities ignoring the two women fighting over Tenchi as usual. "Bwhahahahaha! My invention is complete!" Washu cackled from the closet where she housed her laboratory. Yep, typical.  
  
Meanwhile, as the sun shone brightly in the sky, a young man started walking up the stairs to the Masaki shrine. He wore a white tanktop with a red flannel button shirt hanging loosely over it, baggy khaki shorts, and leather boots. He gazed around to see where he was at on his journey to the top of the stairs, and noticed that there were pretty flowers growing on the side. They were sort of a burgundy-magenta kind of color, and knew that she would probably like it as a welcoming gift.  
  
"I know I've heard of these.what were they called again?" The young man mused, rubbing his chin. "Jurai something.raindrop? Sweatdrop? Candy drop? Ah.oh well, it'll come to me later." He shrugged and let it pass, continuing on. Yosho was sweeping the front of the shrine when he saw the young man walk up to him at the corner of his eye. "Excuse me sir. Where can I find a woman named Ryoko? I heard she lives somewhere nearby." The teen called out. Yosho was about to answer but the teen interrupted saying, "HER.NAME.IS.RYOKO!" He raised his voice louder in case the old man was deaf.  
  
"IS.SHE.NEARBY?" Yosho whacked him on the head with the handle of the broom, with a vein popping out of his forehead. "I'M NOT DEAF, YOUNG MAN!" The teen winced as a big lump with a bandaid appeared on his skull. "Okay, okay! I got you!" He said. "I was just wondering where she was, old man." Yosho sniffed, and continued his sweeping of the shrine. "The woman you're looking for resides in that house with my grandson, his father and about five other women."  
  
He pointed to the house that was at the bottom of the stairs. "What! It was there all along!?" The teen wailed, dropping to his knees. "I came up here for nothing!" Yosho sweatdropped as he watched the young man wail his heart out for walking all the way up the stairs. "Is there something you want with Ryoko?" He asked, studying the teen. The young man stood up regaining his pride and faced the old man. "If I told you, you wouldn't believe me, Lord Katsuhito." He smirked, taking off his sunglasses and revealed gold eyes with a tinge of orange within them. 


	2. What!

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.2-What!???  
  
Sorry for the delay! It's been about a few days since I've written, school and such. Anyway, I don't own Tenchi/Dragonball Z, blah blah blah.Anyway,  
the teen arrives, and everyone is questioning.who is he anyway?  
  
The young man charged down the stairs, or rather flew down it in his hurry to get to the Masaki House. Yosho mused, not surprised that the teen could fly. ".I have a feeling something's going to go down at the house." He said, and kept sweeping.  
  
Tenchi managed to keep Ryoko and Ayeka far from each other by getting Washu to put them in separate universes, (which one is in another broom closet, the other in the attic) until their tempers cooled down. Both women were screaming bloody murder, hoping that Tenchi would forgive them and let them out.  
  
"Tenchi! I LOVE you! Let me out and keep that spoiled brat in!" Ryoko whined, scratching at the closet door. "Tenchi! How about letting me out and the demon can stay?!" Ayeka whined from the attic. "No, not until you guys calm down!" Tenchi said firmly.  
  
".Hmph! Then I shall have to blast this cramped room!" Ayeka said. A hologram of Washu suddenly appeared, smirking in front of Ayeka. "Nope, Ya shouldn't do that. If you do, the whole room's gonna go completely kaboom! That goes for Ryoko, too." Ryoko stuck her tongue out as she heard this.  
  
Meanwhile, Kiyone heard the doorbell ring, and ran to the front door, opening it with Ryo-ohki on her head. "What's up, Ryoko!?" A teen grappled the woman to him. "It's been a while, and boy, I'm glad to see you!" The Galaxy Policewoman sweatdropped. "Uh, I'm not Ryoko." She said. The boy blinked, stepping back and observing Kiyone.  
  
"Hm.blue-green hair.cerulean eyes.I know! You've got a makeover!" Kiyone face-faulted onto the floor. "I'M NOT RYOKO!" She yelled, getting very mad. The teen started sniffing, wiping his eyes. "Wah! You don't love me anymore!" Kiyone slapped her forehead in frustration. "Oh Ryoko, you must've had a hard life.don't worry, I'm here now." He embraced her, patting her back. 'This is kid is getting on my nerves!' She gritted her teeth and gingerly patted him back. Might as well play along. "Er, yeah.sure.I do." She said.  
  
Suddenly, Ryoko and Ayeka were still arguing with Tenchi sulking behind then. Apparently, the alternate world thing didn't work. "Hey, who's the kid Kiyone?" The cyan-haired woman asked. "I don't know! He just came in and started hugging me, Ryoko." Kiyone explained, trying to wrench the kid off her. The teen looked up. "Ryoko?" ".Uh." Tenchi started. "That's my name, don't wear it out." She said. ".Yay!"  
  
He smacked Kiyone into the wall next to him and started getting teary-eyed. "It's my mommy!" He cried, launching himself at her. "What!??" Everyone's eyes widened at what the teen called Ryoko. "Mommy?" Tenchi asked.  
  
"D.don't look at me! I've never seen this kid in my life!" Ryoko explained, trying to pry her "son" off her using a crowbar. ".Ryoko.why I never!" Ayeka screeched. "What is it now?" She asked dully. The princess pointed a finger at her dramatically. "You've been having an affair with someone else! That proves Tenchi is the one for me!"  
  
"What!!!?" "Admit it! You've conceived this young man while you've been hounding after Tenchi!" "I told you, I've never seen him in my life!" Ryoko growled, finally prying the teenager off her. "You hussy!" The teen, hearing Ayeka, angrily stood up. "What did you say?." He questioned dangerously.  
  
"Um, uh." Tenchi started. "How dare you? Do you not know who I am?" Ayeka shot at the young man. "Someone who needs to apologize to my momma!" He growled, his palms crackling with energy. Ryoko observed this with interest. 'So this kid who claims he's my 'son' is defending me against Ayeka? This I got to see!' She thought gleefully. 


	3. Eh?

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.3- Eh?  
  
Our mystery man finally reveals himself, plus other oddities the whole Tenchi crew knows that proves he's the new Masaki 'resident'. Tenchi Muyo  
doesn't belong to me.  
  
The teen growled at Ayeka, an orange orb glowing menacingly in his fingertips. "How dare you insult my momma!" Ayeka shrilly laughed, putting her hand to her mouth. "Ohohohohoho! You're actually going up against me, the princess of Jurai!?"  
  
"Hell yeah, I am." He smirked. "But first, let me properly introduce myself. My name is Ryunks Hakubi. Son of Ryoko Hakubi the space pirate. But you can just call me Ryu." Tenchi's eyes widened, and everyone else came bounding into the living room. "Eh? So the new person isn't a pretty girl!? Darn! I was going to tape her with the other women!" Nobuyuki complained, being perverted as usual. "Dad!" Tenchi growled. "You were taping us!?" Ayeka screamed, her attention being turned to the pervert.  
  
"Er.gotta go!" Nobuyuki dashed from the scene with an angry princess and her two logs chasing after him. Ryoko stared at the teenager. "Ryu? But who's the father? And you look too suspiciously like someone I know that used to visit all the time. But just to let you know, I love Tenchi!" She explained haughtily. Ryu shook his head.  
  
"No, not in this world, mother. I meant in another world.an alternate universe." He said. "Oh, okay! So you're Ryoko's son in another world!" Mihoshi nodded, understanding something other than Space Policemen. "That's right!" Washu appeared before Ryu. "And the interesting thing is, I created him!" ".No you didn't." Ryu said. Washu's face sunk. "I didn't?" She asked. Ryu shook his head. "No, I was born from Ryoko.I think. I can't remember what she told me." Washu's face got a slightly deranged grin upon her face. It looked like she was up to no good.  
  
"Oh, well I understand.do you like electronic gadgets?" The teen's gold eyes gleamed very strangely like Mihoshi's when she hears something exciting. "Oh, very much, Washu!" The pink-haired scientist smirked, leading the boy to the closet. "No wait! Don't go!" Tenchi blurted out. "What?" Ryu asked. "She'll do something to you, like experiment!" He said. ".Ah, I'm sure Granny wouldn't do that to her only grandchild." The teen dismissed it, and followed Washu into the lab. The door shut. "Granny!? I'm not that old you whippersnapper!" She dealt a smack on the light-blue head. "Ow!"  
  
Ryoko sat back on the couch, her head feeling very achy right now. "So.a son in an alternate universe, eh? I feel like my world's been turned upside down." "There there Ryoko.I think he's cute." Mihoshi said, giving her a cup of water. "I think so too!" Sasami, who had been watching the whole thing from the kitchen doorway, blushed. "Of course, not as cute as Tenchi." She added as Ryoko gave a sort of 'don't go near my boy' look at the girl. The space pirate all of a sudden felt very protective of Ryu even though she just met him and he wasn't her son in this world.maybe family ties don't ever change through time.  
  
"What about you, Kiyone? Do you believe in crush at first sight?" Mihoshi asked. Kiyone snorted, sitting next to Ryoko and Tenchi. "No, I don't think so." ".And that's what you get you pervert!" Ayeka's screams were heard from the other side of the house. She stomped in, finally calm. "All right, now that Nobuyuki's been dealed with, where's that scruffy son of yours, Ryoko? He and I have got something to finish!" Ryoko rolled her eyes, drinking her water.  
  
"My "scruffy" son as you called him, is being tortured as we speak." Ayeka's eyes widened in horror. "He might be a rude little offspring of yours, but being in the lab with Washu!? Oh, I must save our guest!" She dashed to the closet, banging on the door "Washu! Let that young man out this instantly! You hear me?!" She yelled. She heard footsteps thudding loudly towards her, and she opened the door.  
  
Ryu came flying out and accidentally trampled over Ayeka. He started running around in circles, screaming that he wasn't going to let Washu stick 'that' 'there' and take some of 'him'. "At least he going to have the right sense of mind to stay away from Washu from now on." Ryoko snickered at the trampled Ayeka on the ground. "Though Ryu getting on Ayeka's nerves is going to be some fascinating entertainment as we get to know him. That's my boy!" Tenchi sweatdropped. "Oh." he groaned. 


	4. Where's Mr Fluffles?

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.4- Where's Mr. Fluffles!?  
  
After some proper introduction, Ryu has happily resided in the Masaki House, and deciding to treat this all as if it was on a vacation. But what does Ryu keep trying to search around the house for? Don't forget I do not  
own Tenchi Muyo! I wish I did, but no.  
  
"Where is he!?" Ryu muttered as he searched the room where he was a roommate with Tenchi. "Where's what?" Asked a confused Tenchi. The teenager rolled his gold eyes as he searched. Tenchi was really grating on his nerves right now with all his confusion, but right now finding it was essential. "Something." Ryu shortly said. "Oh, well if you need help, you can always ask me." Tenchi said, getting up and walking out of the room. "Okay, thanks man." Ryu nodded at the teen's retreating back. The teen continued searching, and not finding him, he materialized into thin air. Perhaps he was somewhere else.  
  
Meanwhile, the women were taking a bath, and the conversation for today was Ryu. ".I think he's every girl's dream guy." Sasami sighed, swooning with Mihoshi. "He's so good-looking.like a mix of Ewan McGregor and Leonardo DiCaprio put together, only with gold eyes." "Hahahaha! He probably gets his looks from his father and me!" Ryoko smirked. "Which reminds me, who is Ryu's father?" Ayeka asked. The cyan-haired woman shrugged.  
  
"I don't know, but he looks awfully familiar. Remember, he's my son in an alternate universe, so the father isn't Tenchi." "Alternate world? So if you're married to someone else, does this mean that I get Tenchi!?" Ayeka said happily. Ryoko glared at her. "I hope not!" ".Why don't we ask Ryu?" Washu asked casually. The rest of the women looked at her strangely. "I thought you already knew the answers, Washu." Kiyone folded her arms and leaned back against the rocks.  
  
"Nope. He got away before I could get an example of his seed." Washu started blushing madly, putting her hands on her face. "But I have to let you know.he's about the same size as Tenchi." As this, Ryoko screamed and stood up in the water, glaring angrily at Washu. "What! How dare you peek at Tenchi! And Ryu! He's your grandson you sicko!" Washu smirked, blushing even more. "But he's not in this world! And he's good-looking and single." Ryoko screamed even more, not believing that Washu could go after her son. She could understand other women.but Washu?  
  
"Ah choo!" Ryu sneezed as he came out of the closet. The 'other' closet, not Washu's, thank goodness. "Hmm.someone must be talking about me." He gave up searching in the house and decided to go take a bath. Little did he know that the women were currently bathing right now. He grabbed his bath stuff and rubber ducky, and materialized to the bath.  
  
".Ryu is a polite young man, I must admit. But why does he keep getting on my nerves even if he's not even near me!?" Ayeka screeched. "He's like a male version of Mihoshi around me!" "But he's not like that, is he Mihoshi?" Sasami asked the blonde. "Oh no, he's more like cross between Tenchi and Washu, and he's not perverted at all like her!" Mihoshi pointed out. Washu growled and threw a plant at her, knocking out the blonde. "I'll teach you to call me pervert!"  
  
"Um, is it because maybe you've got some sort of liking for him?" Ryoko smirked. "What do you mean?! I'm very in love with Tenchi, thank you very much!" "No, really, I've noticed that ever since Ryu got here, you've all been babbling like obsessed fangirls or something." Just then, Ryu appeared out of the rocks with his bath stuff. ".Um."  
  
Ryoko knew that sometime this was going to happen, so she moved to the other side of the onsen so Ryu couldn't see her. Everyone but Ayeka blushed and dove beneath the water, peeking at the boy with only their eyes. Ayeka slowly turned around, and got an angry look on her face. "Um.uh.Miss Ayeka, I can explain!" Ryu nervously backed away, hitting the wall. He tilted his head curiously as he spotted something on her head. "Uh.please don't move."  
  
"You can't tell me what to do! How dare you barge in on us while we're taking a bath! I shall have you removed! Azaka! Kamidake! Seize this pervert!" Ayeka commanded. "No, I mean seriously.don't move. He'll bite you if you do." Ryu panicked. "Who's he?" A puzzled look came over Ayeka's face. Ryu sweatdropped, slowly moving towards Ayeka with his hands out. "Mr. Fluffles, you shouldn't have run away like that."  
  
Ayeka blushed as Ryu came close to her, still looking at the thing on her head. She hadn't realized how good-looking he was up close. Ryu paused, then leaped, snatching Mr. Fluffles off the princess. He landed safely on his feet, but not before accidentally knocking Ayeka out cold by stepping on her head. "Um, sorry." He apologized. Ryoko cracked up, laughing out loud. She was fully dressed, and walked out next to her son.  
  
"What is that thing anyway?" She asked, pointing at the pet in Ryu's hands. "Oh, this is Mr. Fluffles. He's a groundhog." He said. The supposing 'animal' didn't really look like a groundhog all. It had about six eyes, no protruding nose, and sharp fangs. In fact, it looked more like a mini- monster that would reside under little kids' beds. "Isn't he cute?" he asked, showing Mr. Fluffles off, causing the rest of the girls shrink into the water more, but Sasami thought it was cute.  
  
"I got a cabbit named Ryo-ohki. She's really cute, and she'll probably make good friends with your.um." "Groundhog," He smiled, not minding that Sasami thought it was a monster. "Don't worry, he won't bite anyone he likes. I got him as a baby-groundhog from this girl wearing blue and a big funny hat. She was holding what looked to be its mother's litter, so curiously I went over to her and asked if I could buy one. And that's how I got Mr. Fluffles after I convinced Ryoko and my dad to let me have him." Sasami smiled back, still eyeing the 'groundhog' with wary eyes. "Is he housebroken?" She asked.  
  
A/N : The 'girl' that Ryu got Mr. Fluffles from is no other than Millie from Suikoden 2! And the little groundhog monster she has is named Bonaparte. 


	5. Size Does Matter

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.5- It's Size That Matters  
  
After the incident in the onsen, Ayeka still hasn't forgiven Ryu for stepping all over her. In this case, I don't think he even knows how to stop even though he hardly even goes near her. Heh. I do not own Tenchi Muyo whatsoever except Ryu! Thank you!  
  
Bored with the fact he had nothing absolutely to do, Ryu found himself floating into the kitchen and smelled something good. "Sasami must be making Mr. Fluffles his food. How cute of her to do that." He smiled to himself. But before he could even get near enough to look to see what she was cooking for Mr. Fluffles, he accidentally flew into Ayeka, his face in her chest. He blinked and felt what seemed to be two sagging muffins. "Is that you, Ayeka?" He asked.  
  
Ayeka turned extremely red and started chasing after the teen, brandishing a really big spear and screaming several unmentionable obscenities at him. "AAAHHHH!!! I'M SOOOOORRRYYYY!" Ryu panicked, flying away from the p'oed princess of Jurai. "DIE YOU PERVERT!!" He flew outside and landed in Funaho, cowering in fear. Ayeka stopped under there and shook her spear at him. "Come down from there and get what's coming to you, you scruffy offspring off a space pirate!" She screamed. Ryu smirked at her to hide that fact he was terrified of her.  
  
Just then, Ryoko came floating out of nowhere and stood next to Ayeka. "All right, what's wrong now?" She asked dully. "Your scruffy son just fondled me!" Ayeka yelled. "Hey, Ryu, didn't I teach you better? You're supposed to be annoying her with your good looks and occasionally knocking her out!" Ryoko called up into the tree. "But Ma, I didn't mean to. She just appeared in front of me and I went squish!" Ryu called back down.  
  
Ryoko thought about this. "Did I ever breast-feed you, Ryu?" She asked. Ryu nodded. "Yeah. If you're wondering, you were even bigger than Ayeka after you did." He answered. "Oh really? Then I'm happy. Size does matter to attract Tenchi." Ryoko floated away much to the despair of Ryu. Who would rescue him now? Ayeka turned red at what she just heard, she started hacking at Funaho to try and kill Ryu off in place of Ryoko. "PERVERT!" She screamed. Tenchi, who appeared in the nick of time, dragged the princess away from the tree kicking and screaming. "Thanks Tenchi!" Ryu called out.  
  
Back at the Masaki Shrine, Yosho was once again sweeping the front of the shrine. "Ah, I see that they're getting along with Ryu.what a nice young man. Though I'm not sure that discussing the size of women's chests are appropriate for him." He mused to himself. "But, if it makes Ryoko happy, then I guess size does count." He continued sweeping before he went to the house.  
  
It looked like that the Masaki men except Yosho were having some kind of guy-talk in the living room. ".Now I'm not saying she's bigger than the other girls, but she's huge." Nobuyuki said, being the pervert he is. is discussing.things with an 18 year-old. He gave Ryu a bottle of sake and drank until he was drunk. Ryu chuckled, feeling extremely at home. "My momma shaid to me that if I ever meet a girl, I should check out her rack firsht." He slurred.  
  
"Did I say that?" Ryoko asked, sitting on the couch next to him. "I think sho." He smiled drunkenly. "Well, I think I've raised you well, son." Ryoko grinned, raising her bottle in the air. "To my son and his luck with finding a girl whose size does matter!" "Hear hear!" Nobuyuki said, raising his bottle as well. The three totally drunk insane Masaki members on the couch clinked their bottles together and drank til they passed out. Tenchi, who was watching the whole thing, sweatdropped. "Like mother, like son." He sighed. 


	6. A Letter From The Future

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.6- A Letter From The Future  
  
Ryu's a little concerned about his drinking binge from yesterday, especially when his mom is going to arrive for a little visit. Or so it seems to be a visit.so what could it be? Find out!  
  
Ryu slowly opened his eyes, blinking away sleep. "Ohh.my head." He groaned, rubbing his temples. He felt like his mouth had just been stuffed with cotton, and he felt sick. He hadn't drank that much since that one mosh pit party when he was sixteen. His parents got mad at him, and made him drink until he got sick and decided not to drink anymore.  
  
He got up and stumbled into the bathroom, puking into the toilet. Ryoko appeared in the wall next to him and grinned., slapping him on the back. "Good morning son! How's it going?" She greeted. Ryu hacked a little more before turning to face the cyan-haired woman. "Just fine, mother.I think." He puked again, feeling a whole lot worse than fine.  
  
"I'm proud of you, Ryu.you can hold a lot a of booze in ya." Ryoko said. ".I will never drink again!" Ryu vowed, sitting on the bathroom floor. Suddenly, Tenchi came into the bathroom holding a letter. "Hey Ryu, here's a letter from your parents." He said. The young man stood up and opened the letter, mumbling to himself as he read it. His eyes widened a little, then slipped into complete shock. "What? What is it?" Ryoko asked, looking over his shoulder while hanging onto Tenchi. "Mom's coming for a visit, you guys." Ryu said.  
  
"Say what!?" Ayeka shrieked. "There's going to be two Ryokos now!? I can barely handle one!" She grabbed the boy by the shirt and started shaking him wildly in the living room. "That's 'cause you can't handle a real woman like me." Ryoko smirked, still hanging onto Tenchi. Ayeka screamed, throwing Ryu into the nearby wall before launching herself at Ryoko and tried to wrench her off of Tenchi.  
  
"Get off of him you hussy! You.you demon woman whose breasts sag like a wet paper bag!" Ayeka started getting mad, and everyone knew that they should back away now. She threw an empty sake bottle at Ryoko, who phased through it but it hit Tenchi in the head, knocking him out. "Ryu! Ayeka's being mean to me! Defend your momma like a good boy." Ryoko whined. She glanced down at the floor, where the two teens were sprawled on the floor, unconscious.  
  
"Damn.looks like I'm going to ensure some of my own ass-kicking." The space pirate muttered, disappointed that Ayeka knocked out her two favorite people in the room. "Bring it on!" Ayeka said. As they faced each other and was about to once again destroy everything around them, the doorbell rang. "I'll get it!" Sasami said, rushing to the door. She opened the door and there stood a purple-haired young man whom everyone knew.  
  
"What's up, Sasami? Is Tenchi home?" Samami nodded, smiling. "Yep! He's out cold in the living room with Ryu." Trunks came in and took off his shoes, going into the living room. "Ryu? Who's that?" Trunks asked. "He's Ryoko's son." Sasami said. Trunks leapt back, sweatdropping. "You mean to tell me!? Oh my God, are you serious?" "Yeah! He's really cute, and everyone gets along well, except maybe Ayeka."  
  
Trunks ran into the living room and grabbed Tenchi by the shirt, helping him up. "Is it true, man!?" "What's true?" Tenchi asked groggily. Trunks searched around and then saw Ryu standing next to Ryoko, not unconscious anymore. "That guy over there is your son!?" He asked, pointing at Ryu. "A little conceited, aren't you?" Ryu asked dully. "You actually went all the way!?" Trunks said in awe. Tenchi frowned. "What are you talking about, Trunks!? Ryu is not my son! He's from the future, and he has the same spiky hair as Ryoko, so the only logical explanation is that he's her son!" Trunks dropped Tenchi and zoomed towards Ryu, staring into his face.  
  
"Damn, he's like a male version of Ryoko." Ryu's eyebrow went up. "He even has gold eyes, too." The purple-haired teen whirled around. "So who's the father? Anyone know?" He asked. Everyone shrugged except for Washu and Yosho. "Well, since y'all don't know, I just have to say one thing. Congratulations, Tenchi!" Trunks said, patting his back. "He's not my son, dammit! How many times do I got to tell you!?"  
  
Suddenly, the doorbell rang again. Trunks flew to the door and opened it. A figure glomped onto him, wailing her heart out. "WAAAHHHHHH!!!!!! Ryu! How could you run away from home?!?" Trunks turned red, because his face was being mashed into her chest. "Um, lady? I'm not Ryu." He said, his voice muffled. The figure pulled away, and gasped. "Trunks!?"  
  
"Um, Ryoko!?" Trunks' eyes widened. "There's another you!" Ryoko walked to the door. "Oh, well. Meet my future self, Trunks." "Say what!?" 


	7. Yo Momma!

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.7- Yo Momma!  
  
It looks like Ayeka has some problems to deal with, but everyone else seems to be in complete shock when Ryu reveals something important. What could it be?  
  
Trunks jumped back, sweatdropping. "TWO Ryokos!? Now I really know I've been drinking too much! I'm hallucinating!" He said. But he then got a musing grin on his face. "But I'd have to say, 36 D doesn't seem to be a hallucination to me . . . hmm. " "Tee hee . . . naughty." Mirai Ryoko giggled. Ryoko leapt over to the young man and socked him in the head. "Hey! How come YOU don't compliment on the size of my chest, Trunks!?" She asked.  
  
Trunks winced, but grinned at Ryoko. "I don't know. I haven't had my face pushed into your chest yet." Ryoko set out to pummel the hybrid, but Ayeka's voice interrupted them. "Excuse me! Nobody's paying attention to me and my problems!" She screeched. "Ah, put a sock in it, princess." Ryu said, tired of her attitude. "How dare you speak that way to me! I am the crown princess of Jurai, and I demand that you speak to me in a mannerly way, scruffy!" Ayeka ordered.  
  
"Too bad...I don't take orders from selfish, demanding spoiled brats. And I'm not scruffy!" Ryu snorted. "Besides, I'm not the one with the saggiest breasts in the universe . . . and you need some anti-wrinkle cream." Ayeka turned red at what he said. "HOW DARE YOU! I DO NOT HAVE SAGGY BREASTS! I AM THE MOST BEAUTIFUL IN THE UNIVERSE! TENCHI SAYS SO!" Everyone looked at Tenchi, who was confused. "What? I didn't say anything like that!" Ryoko stopped shaking Trunks to listen to the argument.  
  
"Tell ya what. If you use a Wonder bra, and maybe work all that fat off of your body, I'll try and stop running you over." Ryu smirked. Ayeka got mad, but managed to squeak out a comeback. "Oh yeah? Well you momma has a wooden leg with a kick stand on it." Ryu's eyes snapped open. "Say what!?" He growled. Everyone gasped in awe at Ayeka's comeback.  
  
"That's right! Yo Momma has a wooden leg with branches. Can't think of anything else good, can you scruffy?" Ryu narrowed his gold eyes in anger. "Yeah! I saw your mama kicking a can down the street. I asked her what she was doing, and she said "Moving."" Ayeka got mad, turning red. "Yo momma's mouth is so big, she speaks in surround sound!" She yelled.  
  
He got into battle stance, preparing to power up. "Yo mama has green hair and thinks she's a tree!" An aura appeared around Ryu's frame, and it slowly grew as he started to increase his power. Anything not attached to the floor started floating in mid air. "Oh my, that must mean he's not in a good mood, is he?" Mirai Ryoko asked Trunks. ". . . No. I suggest ducking right about now." He said. Ayeka shrilly laughed, putting up her shield.  
  
"Ohohohohoho! I'm not afraid of you! Yo momma's so nasty I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection." Ryu crouched down and yelled, powering up more. His aura grew even larger, electricity crackling around his body. "Yo momma's so stupid she put lipstick on her forehead, talking about she was trying to makeup her mind!" He screamed.  
  
Suddenly, a bright light surrounded everyone, and before you know it, there stood the light-blue spiky haired teen standing in the middle of a destroyed living room with aquamarine eyes and really spiky gold locks. "What the!? He's a super saiyajin!?" Trunks gasped. Mirai Ryoko sighed, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Ryu usually does this when he doesn't get his way or something ticks him off." " . . . But! How! When!?" Trunks stuttered in shock.  
  
"Well let's just say that there was this one time he wanted a motorcycle for Christmas, and when he didn't get it, well, there's the result right there." Mirai Ryoko said, sweatdropping. "Now why the hell wouldn't you give an 18-year old a motorcycle? I'd give it to him if he'd let me borrow sometimes." Ryoko snorted. "He was only 8 years old, Ryoko." "Oh, well. . . never mind then." She said. "Come on, princess! Yo momma's so nasty she made speed stick slow down!" Ryu challenged. "Bring it on! Yo momma's so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!"  
  
Ayeka changed into her battle uniform, and started off the fight with two purple photon blasts. Ryu moved his head to the side as the blasts collided into a wall. Tenchi started freaking out as they nearly hit him. He almost passed out at the damage it put into the house. "Go Ryu! Defend yo momma! Tell her that her momma so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read!" Ryoko cheered. Ryu held out his hands, and almost like magic, two aqua colored energy balls formed in his palms, and as he closed his hands over it, it turned into what looked like double swords. "Let's see how you fare against a super saiyajin!"  
  
"I don't need to use these, but if I need to prove my point, so be it!" Ryu flew at Ayeka, swinging his swords at her. The princess held out her hand and shot blasts at him, but he avoided them and tried to break through her shield. He did successfully, so Ayeka flipped over him, but Ryu teleported and swung one of his swords at her. Ayeka ducked, punching him into the gut and elbowed Ryu in the back of his head, sending him into the floor in luck. Tenchi gasped in horror as a hole appeared in the wood. "Stop! You'll wreck my house!" Ryu rolled once and jumped kicked Ayeka in the stomach as he flipped onto his feet.  
  
The princess stopped herself a few centimeters before hitting the wall, but the teen tackled her, and they both crashed through the wall much to Tenchi's shock again. There was a big scuffle with limbs, stars, planets, and swirls flying around in the little fighting cloud for a few minutes before it cleared. "Give up, Ayeka! You can't win! Yo momma's so nasty she brings crabs to the beach!" Ryu gritted his teeth as he smacked her head with a hammer that went squeak. He had her in a headlock and was trying to make her pay. "Never!" She said, covering her face as she endured the "pain".  
  
"I'll never give up! That's not my philosophy!" "Yeah, well you better change it soon, because next time I'm gonna lay the Smackdown on you!" Ayeka peeked through her hands as she heard what he said. "What? You're letting me off?" She asked. Ryu shrugged, throwing the hammer away. It hit Tenchi in the head, knocking him out cold. "Ah, this ain't worth my time. It's something silly anyway." Ryoko jumped in, foaming at the mouth. "Say what!? The fight was getting good and you can just say silly!? Are you really my son!?"  
  
Ryu let go of Ayeka's head and stood up straight. "I realized it's dumb and it wastes energy, Ryoko. Kind of the way you guys chase after Tenchi. If I wanted to fight, I would've picked a fight with an evil villain. I don't fight girls." He said, folding his hands behind his head. "You were holding back!? "Ayeka asked. "Well yeah, because I didn't want to hurt you, princess." "Are you saying I'm weak!?" "No, that's not what I meant. . . really. I meant that I could really hurt people if I fight at my full power." Ryu explained.  
  
"So you're saying I'm weak, is that right?!" Ayeka screeched. "Yo momma has a bald head with a part and sideburns!" " Yo momma's so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K." Ryu snapped back. The princess snorted and turned away, deciding to ignore him. "Hmph! I'll show you who's weak! Come Azaka! Kamadake! We must think of a plan!" "Yes, ma'am!" The floating logs said as they followed her.  
  
Ryu strolled after her, having returned to his normal self. "Now see here!" But unfortunately Mihoshi was underfoot for some reason, and Ryu tripped over her, falling flat faced on the floor. His scrabbled to pick himself up and he accidentally lifted the hem of her kimono up with his head that he saw her panties. Ryu turned beet red, and Ayeka punched him into the highest atmosphere, screaming a bunch of obscenities as she did so.  
  
"So that's her full power. . . wow." Trunks said, impressed. "Are you sure Ryu's not your kid, Tenchi? Maybe you're part sayajin." He completely changed the subject for no reason. Tenchi got mad at him. "For the last time, no!" "Geez, just wondering. Who is the father anyway?" Trunks asked. "Here we go again. Maybe I should explain it this time." Washu butted in, relieving the young Maskai landlord. "Ryu is YOUR kid, Trunks." "Say what!?" Trunks' jaw dropped and kissed the ground. Everyone gasped. No wonder Ryu looked so awfully familiar. . . 


	8. No Need For A Son!

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.8- No Need For a Son!  
  
Trunks is shocked to hear the fact that Ryu is his son. But how is that possible? Washu has all the answers, and everyone is eager to hear them. In the meantime, Ryoko takes the time to find Ryu and sort of have a mother- son talk.  
  
"No way. That is not possible..." Trunks shook his head, backing up against a wall that wasn't ruined by the fighting earlier. "All of it's true." Washu said. "I dragged Ryu into my lab and retracted some of his "DNA." And I must say, I was surprised at what I found." Tenchi eyed her weirdly. "Oh hell no you did not!" Ryoko jumped up from her place on the couch and fumed at the short scientist. "Did I ever tell you he's the same size as Tenchi?" Washu asked.  
  
"You said that a month ago!" Ryoko yelled. "Oh yes, and I remember it very well. Did you know his hair's blue? And it's soft too." The pink-haired girl grinned like a deranged hentai on crack. "Gah! I did not need to hear that!" Kiyone said, plugging her ears and trying to hum happy thoughts. Ayeka gasped, and covered Sasami's ears. "Think of the children, Miss Washu!" She said. "I'm not a child, Ayeka." Sasami said, holding Mr. Fluffles and Ryo-ohki in her arms. "Ryu let me feel it when he let me scrub his head when he was bathing." She said, completely unaware of what Washu had said except for soft blue hair. Sasami meant head hair, but everyone else thought otherwise because well, they had perverted minds.  
  
"Sasami! How could you!? You're a...a girl and...he's a guy! Why would you do such a thing like that!?" Ayeka wailed. "I wanted to, Ayeka. Wouldn't you scrub Tenchi's head if he asked you to?" Sasami asked. Ayeka turned red. "Uh...oh is that what you mean? Heh heh...just ignore me..." She turned and ran away, blushing. Washu shook her head in laughter. "What was that all about?" Sasami asked. "Uh...let's just say that Ayeka was concerned because uh...she thought you were feeling his you-know-what." "Wiener?" She asked. "Agh! Stop it before I shoot you all!" Kiyone said, squeezing her eyes shut.  
  
Trunks still was shaking his head. Washu whacked him with her genius hammer and growled at him. "Listen! Ryu is your kid, got that? You and Ryoko get married in an alternate universe and have a kid! If you don't believe me, then come check it out in my lab!" Trunks still didn't believe her. "Ah, screw it, if you don't want to hear, that's your choice." She went off, mumbling curses under her breath at the fact nobody wanted to hear her geniusness.  
  
Meanwhile, Ryu had just fallen into the lake outside the Masaki house. "Ah, there you are, Ryu. I was wondering when you'd get back." Ryoko grinned, helping him out of the water. "Remind me to never look up Ayeka's skirt again." Ryu spit out water whiningly. "Ah, it was an accident. No big deal at all, son." She said. They sat on the ground, with Ryu drying himself off. "Anyway, so explain to me. Why are you here?" Ryoko asked. Ryu looked at her. "Well, I just wanted to know what it was like back when father was young, mother." "Well, if my other self is here, then where's Mirai Trunks?" "...Um...he disappeared a long time ago, when I was eight." "Is that the time when you asked for a motorcycle?" She asked.  
  
"...Uh, yeah." Ryu said sheepishly. "Has anyone found him yet?" "Washu has a thingy on father, but it's only a matter of time." Ryoko studied her son and noticed how much they looked and were alike. "You know what? We're so alike, we could be twins." She pointed out. "Yeah, well, how about we try that? It'll be weird, yet fun at the same time." Ryu grinned. "Okay, sure."  
  
Mother and son got up and went to the house. "You know, that was a completely pointless talk we had." Ryu commented. "Hell yeah, it was. Now get inside before you catch cold, Ryu." Ryoko pushed him inside and closed the door. Ayeka, who had been running earlier, smacked right into Ryu. The teen found himself on the ground with Ayeka on top of him. "Agh! Get off! I want to save my virginity when I get married!" He cried, trying to scoot out from under her.  
  
"What are you talking about!? How dare you!" Ayeka fumed, getting off him but taking her sweet time. Ryoko booted Ayeka off her son, and yelled at her for a couple of minutes before taking Ryu with her. "I don't need a son!" Trunks wailed, running away up the stairs. Washu ran after him, brandishing what looked to be a some kind of needle, but very blunt. "Hold still! I need your sperm to conduct an experiment!" She called after him. "Oh my, I almost forgot how crazy it can be here." Mirai Ryoko said, running after them for fun. "Oh Mother!" Ryu sighed, shaking his head.  
  
I'd like to thank everyone who has so far enjoyed my story! I've rewritten ch.7 to satisfy people, and I hope it's to your liking! If not, I tried my best, okay? If anyone has an idea what Ryu should get into trouble for, whether bothering Ayeka or such, please review! And I think the story is becoming rated R by the way the whole plot is going...gee. ^.^ 


	9. Trouble In The Onsen

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.9- Trouble In the Onsen  
  
Luckily Trunks had managed to get away from Washu by hiding in another closet that wasn't her lab. Everyone goes his or her own way after the entertainment is done, and Tenchi goes to take a bath. What's going to happen?  
  
"Wow...what a weird day..." Tenchi sighed as he sank into the warm water in the onsen that floated above the lake. "First the whole thing Ryu is Trunks and Ryoko's son, then they start talking about blue hair and wieners...what's next, someone's going to come and try and stalk me like usual?" He snorted aloud. He was right in a way...because he heard Ryoko and Ayeka arguing a few feet away.  
  
"No! He can't come into the bath with us! Are you insane?!" Ayeka screeched. Ryoko put a hand on her slim hips and glared at Ryoko. "What are you talking about? People here do it all the time! Why can't Ryu take a bath with us?" Ayeka blushed, but still glared back. "B...Because! We are women, and he's a man!" "...He's my son, Ayeka! He's my own flesh and blood!" "...Ahh, that feels good, mother." Ryu's voice said happily another few feet away. Ryoko and Ayeka looked at each other before they walked to the other side of the onsen, hiding behind a plastic tree.  
  
Ryu sat in the water, with Mirai Ryoko scrubbing his back with a towel. "See?" Ryoko snorted, tossing her hair. "No worries, princess." She walked back to where they were and settled into the water. She spotted a familiar black-haired head, and she grinned evilly. Seeing that Ayeka was still occupied with debating whether bathing with family members of the opposite sex was wrong, Ryoko proceeded to where an unarmed Tenchi sat in the water.  
  
"I really hope nobody knows I'm here." Tenchi said to himself. Ryoko tiptoed behind him and slapped her hands over his eyes. "Guess who!" "Agh!" Tenchi panicked, his arms flailing around wildly as he tried to get out of the water. "Why don't you like me, Tenchi!?" Ryoko wailed, glomping onto him. The teenager turned red as her breasts squished against his back. "Aren't my breasts the size you want them to be!? I thought you liked squishing them every night we make sweet love to each other!?"  
  
Ayeka heard this and immediately zoomed to them. " HOW DARE YOU SAY SUCH VILE THINGS LIKE THAT YOU HUSSY!" She screamed, pouncing onto her and making a big splash in the water. Ryoko pulled Tenchi away, sticking her tongue out at the princess. "Just because you're jealous of Tenchi making love to me at night doesn't mean you have the right to call me names." Tenchi still flailed his arms around, his eyes as wide as dinner plates. "WHAT!? I never..." Ayeka squeezed her eyes shut, her fists shaking. "...Tenchi..." She sniffled. "...I will make sure...RYOKO GETS HER MITTS OFF OF YOU!" Her face turned demon-like, and she flung herself, latching onto Tenchi's waist, tackling both of them out of the water and onto the ground.  
  
Ryu had just finished taking a bath and was proceeding towards the exit of the onsen when he passed the scuffle and had to backtrack to see what was going on. His mouth dropped open as he saw a swirl-eyed Tenchi with Ryoko under him and Ayeka on top of him. "Oh my god, I've just been blinded!" Ryu cried out, covering his eyes with his right hand but was still peeking from between his fingers. His left hand was holding up his towel. "Ryu, it's not what it seems!" Ayeka cried out. "Oh ho, it is Ryu." Ryoko smirked, pinning Tenchi's body down to grind against hers. But luckily he was wearing a towel so nothing happened. "Tenchi and I were making sweet passionate love when Ayeka here interrupted us." Ayeka smacked Ryoko on the head as they sat up.  
  
Tenchi, who had amazingly woken up, found himself on top of Ryoko. "Oh my god, what just happened!?" he panicked. "Don't be so modest Tenchi...you know you liked it." Ryoko said, rubbing her cheek against his. Ayeka booted her off him. "LIKED WHAT!?" he screamed, flailing his arms once more. Ryu still had his eyes covered. "God Tenchi, if you were having a threesome with both of them, the least you could do was get a bedroom! There are people here who do not want to see nakedness! MAINLY ME, hint hint!" He cringed. Tenchi turned red while Ryoko laughed out loud.  
  
"Stop thinking that!" Tenchi cried out angrily. Ryu's eye kept twitching for a few seconds. "Must...not...think...about...it..." His chest heaved, and he finally ran out of the onsen, screaming at the top of his lungs as his arms flailed around madly. "TENCHI'S HAVING A THREESOME WITH AYEKA AND RYOKO! SOMEONE SAVE ME FROM GOING BLIND! AAAHHHHHH!" He ran into the Masaki house fully dressed. "Horrible, isn't it?" Kiyone asking, guiding Ryu into the kitchen for some hot chocolate. Little did they know someone was spying on them from a spy camera up in space. "At last, I will have my revenge!" A figure chuckled evilly. "But first, some coffee and donuts! Come, Zero-One, let us have some evil pastries." "Yes, sir." Who could they be, and why do they want revenge? Find out soon! 


	10. The Time Space Continuum Adventure Pt1

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.10-The Time/Space Continuum Adventure Pt.1  
  
Like usual, Washu Mihoshi/Ryoko-proofed her lab so they wouldn't barge in nor trip their way into her things. But little did the genius know that she hadn't thought about Ryu...  
  
"Hellloooo? Washu-chan?" Ryu poked his head into her lab gingerly, hoping that the genius wouldn't actually hear him and try to steal more of him for her "experiments". He walked farther in, carrying a tray full of food in his hands, letting the door behind him materialize into thin air. "It's dinnertime, and I brought some dinner for you! It's your favorite!" he called out. Getting no answer, Ryu wandered around, knowing for the fact that he wouldn't risk his life by touching any of Washu's things on the tables around him. Or would he?  
  
As he wandered past some trees, he passed by a weird machine that looked like a gigantic beach ball with wires attached to it. Doubling back, he knew he heard about such a machine from Ryoko. But this machine was twice the size of the original, causing the teen's mouth to drop open in awe. He placed the tray of food down on a table and walked towards it. He noted that there was stuff all over the floor, so the invention wasn't quite finished yet. A keyboard was beside the door, with a note stuck on it. 'Please note that all words inputted are to be chosen wisely, whereas the world you search for has to be specific. Thank you.'  
  
Ryu rubbed his chin, musing as he read it. "Hmm...an alternate world thingy? Sounds kind of dangerous, yet fun at the same time!" He reached out to type something, but then Sasami's voice sounded from outside, calling for him. "Ryu! Come and eat!" The teen grinned to his self and shrugged. "Oh well, maybe next time." He walked away and went out of the lab. However, someone watched him before they slithered down to tiptoe to the machine. Ryoko jumped out of the shadows and grinned evilly as she saw the machine. "Ah ha! So, Washu made another transporting world search-find machine, eh? NOW's my chance to finally get what I want!"  
  
Ryoko reached out to type, but suddenly an aura of electricity shot out and started tickling Ryoko. She tried to hold her breath, but she busts out laughing like a banshee. It was like being prodded with a tazer, only funnier. "AHAHAHAHAHAHA! WHAT...THE...HELL!? AHAHAHAHA!" "...Caught you red- handed Ryoko!" Washu smirked, coming out of the shadows. She held a remote control in her hand, crossing her arms. "I knew you were going to come sometime. I was better prepared." "S...stop it! I...I'm getting boob sweat! AHAHAHAHA!" Ryoko tried to yell at her, but she couldn't.  
  
Washu shook her head. "Nope...you're just going to have to deal with it. Unless you promise not to come in here anymore except for my permission. Got that, Ryoko?" She asked. "Y...yeah, fine." The pink-haired scientist released Ryoko, and she tumbled to the floor. "There you go, 'Superstar.'" The cyan-haired one snapped her head up, growling like an animal.  
  
Meanwhile, in the dining room, Ryu was eating as fast as he could, much to the amazement of his fellow residents. "Where are you going in such a rush, Ryu?" Yosho asked. "Me? Well-I'm-trying-to-get-to-Washu's-lab-first-so-I- can-type-in-something-into-her-doo-hickey-so-I-can-visit-some-other-world- where-everything-is-messed-up-because-everyone's-gonna-find-out-eventually- and so-we-get-sent-into-many-alternate-worlds-where-someone's-gonna-end-up- not-wanting-to-come-back-and-I-really-hope-it's-Ayeka, damn-that-biatch." Ryu gave an evil glare so quickly it looked like a blur at the princess.  
  
"Okay, have fun." Yosho said. Ryu grinned, and bolted from the table, jumping like a deer in a field. "...Hold up!" Tenchi jumped up and ran after Ryu. "I need a vacation!" The rest of girls also jumped up, suddenly realizing what they wanted to do. "Wait for us!" They wailed, running after the two guys. Anyway, in the lab, Ryoko was giving Washu the death glare from the floor. "I'll teach you for making me sweat you...!" Ryu suddenly bounded in, followed by the rest of the Masaki residents in trying to fight their way to the machine.  
  
They all managed to type in something before everyone else shoved each other away to get their turn. "How do you spell saiyajin?" Trunks asked, shoving Ayeka out of the way. "S...A...I...Y...A...J...I...N..." Mihoshi said. "It's how the original word is spelled." "No! Not Vegeta-land! Not the happiest place on earth! Anything but that!" Washu said, horrified as she dashed over to the group. "OOPS, too late." Trunks pressed enter. BLIP! "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Everything seemed to go slow-mo as Washu launched herself at the machine. But time sped up normally as she hit the ground, just a few inches away. "Chill, Washu. It's already in." Trunks said. "You ass! Do you know what happens if we go there?!" She cried.  
  
"No. But the song is catchy! (Goes to the tune of 'The Wonderful Thing about Tiggers') O/` The worst thing about Vegeta, that Vegeta is an arrogant prince! His heart is made out of cement, his eyes are like a mask! He's a spandex-wearing treasure troll haired receding hairline guy! But the wonderful thing about Vegeta is that he is not here! O/` I forgot most of the second stanza, but it's very fun to sing." Trunks said. "No! Evil song!" Washu cringed, plugging her ears. Suddenly, the machine started shaking, going crazy. Then everything went bright. "Argh! I've gone blind!" Kiyone said, shielding her eyes. A wormhole opened up, sending everyone into the abyss. When Washu opened her eyes, she saw they had all vanished. "Dang it! Not again! This happened last time!"  
  
Everyone screamed as they flew through the wormhole at amazing speed, then everything went bright as they reached the end of the tunnel.  
  
A young man stood on the bridge connecting one bank of the creek to the other. He wore a kimono with a funny-looking hat on. He heard some drumming, and turned around to see a young woman walk slowly across the yard with some servants behind her. A hood covered her head, so he couldn't see her face. She finally reached the bridge, shooing away the people beside her. "My Lord, have you been waiting long?" She asked quietly. The young man shrugged, then looked at his watch. "Um, well, it took you about ten minutes to get here, so sure, why not?"  
  
The young woman's head snapped, and an evil look was on her face. "What are you talking about!? I'm completely on time!" She started bonking him on the head with a hammer. She managed to calm down and smiled at the prince before her. "Now Lord Trunks, I have a mission for you. There's demons running around, and I'd like you to smite them for me." Trunks blinked. "Smite? How about just run them out of town, princess Ayeka?" he asked. "...I'll just ignore what you just said. Anyway, they have possessed Lord Tenchi, and I demand that you, my hired exorcist, to make sure you get the curse off! Do you understand!?" Ayeka said, leering at the purple-haired one.  
  
"Yes, but getting a hangover is not a curse..." "Who cares!?" Ayeka screeched. "I want them gone!" Trunks leaped back, and sweat-dropped. "Fine whatever." Meanwhile, Ryu, Tenchi, and Ryoko were having a party on the roof. "Here, have some more sake, Tenchi dear." Ryoko garbled out, pouring him another cup. "Oh no, I can't drink anymore." Tenchi said, pushing away the cup. His cheeks were already bright red from his drunkenness. "Lemme at it!" Ryu said, taking the bottle and started chugging it down. "Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug!" They cheered. Trunks heard them, and flew to the roof. "Shh! You guys! The princess will hear you!" he whispered fiercely.  
  
"Aw, let her hear us!" Ryoko said. "But I have to slay the demons running around!" Trunks explained. "We'll help you!" Ryu said, standing up and flexing his muscles. "...You guys are the demons." "...Oh." The teen sat back down. "Well, who will protect us?" He asked. Ryoko wrapped around Tenchi with her arms. "Tenchi here will protect us, I know he will." She purred in his ear. Tenchi, too drunk to do anything, shook his head. "Nah." Ryoko narrowed her eyes and pulled away. "Not even for this?" She lifted up her shirt and flashed Tenchi. "Gah! They're melons!" Tenchi screamed, shielding his eyes. Ryu was too busy drinking, he didn't notice. Trunks just slapped his hand to his face in frustration at Ryoko.  
  
Ayeka heard Tenchi's scream and came running. "Tenchi! Don't worry! I'll save you!" She managed to reach the front of the house and shook her fist at the people up there. "Trunks! You're supposed to slay the demons! Not party with them!" She yelled. Trunks looked down at her. "The female demon's got a bigger chest than you, princess!" he called down. "Say WHAT!? What is it with you and big boobs, Trunks!?" He shrugged. "Uh, because hers are big and squishy?"  
  
Meanwhile, back in the original world, Washu had just finished making repairs to the machine. "Well, here goes nothing! Cancel!" She pushed a button on the ball. Just when Ayeka was about to pole-vault her way on to the roof, everything turned white once again. 


	11. The Time Space Continuum Adventure Pt2

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.11- The Time/Space Continuum Adventure Pt.2  
  
What kind of other worlds will our groups fall into as they go through time and space? Will Trunks stop thinking about Ryoko's melons? And how much can  
poor Tenchi take anyhow as they next find themselves going to school?  
  
It was early morning, and a purple-haired lad and lass were walking down the street. "I'm sooo tired, Ayeka." Trunks said, yawning and stretching his arms out. "Well dear brother, if you don't spend so much time looking at your Penthouse magazines and get to bed on time, you wouldn't be like this." Ayeka said. "I...I don't like Penthouse!" Trunks sweatdropped, defending himself. "Uh huh." Just then, a couple of their classmates waved to them as they passed by. "Hi, Ayeka! Hi Trunks!" They said.  
  
"Good morning!" They greeted back. Suddenly, they heard a noise beside them, and they saw Ryoko and Ryu running up to them. "Here we go again." Ayeka muttered. "Hey y'all!" Ryu greeted. "Good morning, Ryu. Had a good night's sleep?" She asked. "Yep! Thanks for asking." Ryoko suddenly pushed Ryu out of the way. "Hey Ayeka! Did you get your homework done? I need to copy off of you!" She said. Ayeka turned her head. "Too bad. If you don't do your work, it's your own fault!" She sniffed. "What!? Oh come on, pretty please!?" Ryoko begged. Ayeka glared at her, wondering how on earth Ryu could get stuck with Ryoko as his twin sister. The gods must've been harsh on him.  
  
"No! And that's that!" Tenchi then suddenly came along. "Hello, everyone!" "Oh hi!" Ayeka and Ryoko said, getting sparkly eyes. "What up, dawg!?" Trunks and Ryu greeted him, exchanging high fives with each other. "Oh nothing much. Ready for yet another boring school day?" "Yeah." The six friends then started walking to school. Ryoko tried her best to rub herself against Tenchi, but Ayeka immediately booted her off him and tried to hold his arm herself. This ended with a catfight and an injured Tenchi and beaten up siblings when they tried to stop them.  
  
"Ooh! I can't stand you Ryoko!" Ayeka fumed, stomping off with a sweatdropping Trunks in tow as they headed towards the entrance of Orange Star High School. "Ayeka, really! Ryoko didn't mean it when she wedgied you! Honestly!" Trunks protested. "Oh YEAH!? Well since you defend that awful girl so much why don't you marry her or something!?" Ayeka yelled. "...Hmm...I can see the possibilities...I could lose my virginity before prom." Trunks pretended to think. "That's not what I meant you perv!" The purple- haired girl said, smacking him on the head as they entered the school.  
  
Meanwhile, Tenchi was having his own problems in his classes a few periods later. Ryoko was trying to rub herself against him without distracting the rest of the class as they gave their report in class. Mihoshi tried hard not to fall asleep at her teacher's desk as she listened. "...In conclusion, that is why I deserve Tenchi's undivided attention!" The class looked at each other before clapping reluctantly. Ryu wasn't paying attention, as he was busy in his own little world. "Hee hee hee...man, I'm wasthed." He said, drinking his sake behind his books. His cheeks were bright red, and looked like he was going to pass out drunk. "...Teacher! Ryu's drinking in class!" Someone said, raising his or her hand.  
  
Mihoshi woke up and yawned. "What?" Ryu gave the tattletale an evil look and mouthed to them that he was going to beat them into the ground after school. The student paled and gulped, facing straight ahead. "Ryu, you know you're not supposed to be drinking in class." Mihoshi said as she stopped by the light-blue haired teenager's desk. "That's right." The student said. "...If you wanted to drink, you should wait until lunch time." The whole class face-faulted onto the ground except for Tenchi and Ryoko. He was too busy trying to get Ryoko off him. "...Sure I will, but I felt like drinking now. Here, have shome Mish Mihoshi." Ryu grinned drunkenly, pouring her some.  
  
"Oh, thank you!" The blonde proceeded to drink up the sake, but Ayeka suddenly barged into the classroom with Trunks. "I'm sorry my brother and I are late, Miss Mihoshi, but...WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, RYU!?" Ayeka screamed, dropping Trunks and pointing at him. "Me? Oh, I'm having a party, Ayeka. Join ush, why don't you?" Ryu asked. "That's absolutely against the rules! And as class President, I order you to stop drinking!" The purple- haired girl yelled. "Aw, you can't tell me what to do you old hag." Ryoko burst out laughing, still hanging onto Tenchi. "How dare you! Why are you all against me!?" Ayeka asked. "...You never let ush have any fun. That'sh why." Ryu answered.  
  
"Oh yeah!? Well wait until I tell your mother what you've been up to!" She yelled. "...You wouldn't dare!" Ayeka gave Ryu a look. "...Fine...exchuse me..." The light-blue haired boy walked into the hallway and closed the door. He walked away from the classroom far enough. He then turned SSJ and soon all his drunkenness was gone. He sourly walked back into the classroom with his hair still gold and spiky. "Dude! Nice hair." One of students commented. "Thanks." Ryu said. Ayeka smirked at him as everyone sat in their desks. "Oh, you just wait..." He muttered under his breath.  
  
The next period, the group had gym class. "Aw man! I forgot my gym uniform!" Trunks groaned, smacking his head against the lockers. "...You can borrow some of mine, Briefs." The burly gym teacher said, tossing him a pair of really large gym clothes. "Er...thanks." Outside, Ryu was faintly smirking as he watched Trunks come out with the gym teacher's clothes. The now sober teenager wore his own gym clothes with his arms folded as he leaned against the fence. Trunks had a really sour look on his face as he stood next to Ryu. "...Stupid...too big..." He grumbled, scratching his arms.  
  
In the meantime, Ayeka and Ryoko were playing volleyball, each on the other team. "Take this! Ha!" Ryoko spiked the ball, which smacked Ayeka in the face. "RYOKO! HOW DARE YOU!!" She growled, walking under the net and glaring at her. "Now now, ladies. There's no need for fighting." The teacher said, separating them. "It's just a game you know." "...Hmph!" Ayeka went back to the front line and waited, growling at Ryoko at the same time. "I'll show her!" The cyan-haired girl smirked and served the ball. "Here goes the winning spike you losers!"  
  
Meanwhile, Trunks started scratching his arms with a little more force. "Will you stop scratching already?" Ryu said. "I can't...I'm really itchy for some reason." "...Maybe because the gym teacher doesn't wash the clothes?" Ryu said dully. "Eh? What do you mean?" Trunks demanded. "Look." Ryu said, nodding in the teacher's direction. Trunks' face turned blue as he watched the gym teacher scratch himself down below. "Oh Kami, he's scratching himself." He wailed. "See? Unlike you I actually bring my own gym clothes." Ryu said.  
  
Trunks' fists shook in horror before he whirled around. "Give me your gym suit then!" He said, trying to take it off him. "What!? No way, man!" Ryu struggled to get out of Trunks' grip. Someone watched them, a smile slowly forming on the person's face. "I think those four kids need to get along. What do you think, Ryo-ohki?" She asked. "Well, okay. Just make sure you don't reveal yourself!" Ryo-ohki said.  
  
As a classmate threw a baseball, Tenchi made a home run, but it ran out of bounds instead. "I'll get it!" Tenchi called. He jogged over to some bushes by the baseball field. He looked around a bit, and saw the baseball, and what seemed to look like another one, only slightly pink. "Huh?" he picked it up, only to find a strange looking animal hanging from it with swirls in its eyes. "Myaa..." It said dizzily. "Ah!" Tenchi dropped the creature in shock. A girl came out of the bushes. "Oh! Did I scare you?" Sasami asked, smiling as she walked out of the bushes. "Oh...uh...I didn't mean to knock out your pet there miss...?" "My name is Sasami." She said, holding her hand out.  
  
"Oh, well my name is Tenchi." Sasami picked up the unconscious cat-like thing. "And this is Ryo-ohki. Cute, isn't she?" Tenchi smiled embarrassingly. "Um, I can fix up her bump if you want me to." He took out a handkerchief and tied it around the cabbit's wound. She meowed in thanks and rubbed herself against his cheeks. "Hey Tenchi! Where are you!?" Someone else called out. "Don't tell me you got lost in the bushes!" "I'm coming!" he called out. Before he left he gave a grin and patted her head. "It was nice to meet you Sasami." She blushed, and smiled back.  
  
"...He's a really nice guy." Ryo-ohki said. Sasami looked at her. "Ryo-ohki, shh. We're not in the magic kingdom now, so you can't let anyone know you talk." "Sorry Sasami. So...what are we going to do about those four people over there arguing?" She asked, pointing at Ryu, Trunks, Ayeka, and Ryoko screaming at each other. "I'd say that this looks like a job for me!" Sasami said, taking out a small pen. "Pretty Sammy, transform!" She transformed very much like Sailor Moon in almost every way. Except that instead of meatballs on her head, she had red odangos coming from her pigtails.  
  
She held up a victory sign. "I'm Magical Girl...Pretty Sammy!" She said. In the meantime, Ryu, Ayeka, Ryoko, and Trunks were yelling at each other about stupid things that only idiots like them would bring up. "Oh yeah!? Well you can just take that pole and shove it up your ass! Maybe you can get laid that way!" Ryu yelled at Trunks. "Not unless I do it first!" he yelled back. "...At least I have some Ryoko!" Ayeka screamed. "You!? HA! Tenchi likes women with large breasts!" Ryoko sneered. "...What kind of stupidity are they arguing about now!?" A woman wearing a business suit came stomping up.  
  
"...I don't really know exactly, Principal Kiyone. But whatever it is it's giving me a headache." Mihoshi said, coming up behind her. "...WILL YOU ALL SHUT UP PLEASE!?" Kiyone yelled. The two guys and two girls looked at her a bit, but then started arguing again. Kiyone let out a frustrated sigh. "ARGH! The things I have to put up with everyday! First they all start arguing, and then in some weird way they all make up and are friends again! And then they start all over!" "...You don't have to worry about that, ma'am!" A voice called out.  
  
"Huh?" Everyone looked around. "...Hey, who's that?" Someone asked, pointing out a figure on top of the school roof. A girl stood there, holding a wand in her hands. "Whoever she is, she's got bad fashion." Ayeka said. "Hey, at least she's better than you." Ryoko said. "What did you say!?" She screamed once again. "I am Pretty Sammy! I love things that are good and kind and get along well! I think that you four need a little brushing up on sharing your feelings!" "Huh?" Trunks asked. Pretty Sammy held up her wand and chanted some words. It turned into a bow and arrow. "Be friends, you four!" She then shot the arrow through all four of them.  
  
Everyone looked in awe as Trunks, Ryu, Ayeka, and Ryoko suddenly started blushing at each other. "Um...what's this feeling I have inside of me?" Ayeka asked. "...It means that you want to be my friend, Ayeka. And I too, always wanted to be your friend...but I was too shy to tell you." Ryoko said. "Oh, Ryoko! I didn't know." Ayeka said, blushing. "Oh Ayeka..." Ryoko said, putting her arms around her to hug. "Ryoko..." "Ayeka..." "Ryoko..." Ryu watched this with tear-filled eyes before turning to Trunks. "...Trunks...I...I'm sorry..." "No...it's my fault, Ryu...it's my big mouth." Trunks said. "...No, actually, it's mine." Ryu said. "Oh...Ryu...you don't have to..." "No...I insist." "Oh Ryu..." "Trunks..."  
  
Pretty Sammy watched all this with a smile on her face. "It's so nice when people get along." "...What's wrong with them Kiyone?" Mihoshi asked with swirls in her eyes. "...I don't know Mihoshi..." Kiyone added, with swirls in her eyes also. "Will someone please tell me what's going on!?" Tenchi screamed in horror. Ayeka and Ryoko looked at each other with passion in their eyes before they leaned in. So did Ryu and Trunks. "Well, that's finished!" Washu said, pressing a button on the machine in the regular dimension. "Cancel!" 


	12. The Time Space Continuum Adventure Pt3

Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko  
Ch.12- The Time/Space Continuum Adventure Pt.3  
  
As we wind down in our time/space adventure, some people want to stay in their so-called perfect world...but what would it take for them to change their minds?  
  
"Stop them!' Several police officers yelled as they chased after a woman and two men driving in a car. "Buahahahaha! Try and catch us you losers!" Ryoko sneered as she whipped out a pistol and shot at the officers. The bullets hit the tires, causing them to pop and make the car swerve out of control. It crashed into a nearby building, but luckily the officers jumped out in time. "HAHAHAHAHAH!" She laughed as she and her partners in crime got away. "Money money money! I just love money!" Ryu said as he buried his hands into the bags of stolen cash and sniffed it. "Ooh! I think it has crack in it too!"  
  
Ryoko sighed and thwaped her son across the head. "Ryu, honey ...stop trying to think there's some in everything." "But mommy!" Ryu whined. Ryoko gave him the look, and he immediately stopped. "...Sorry ma." In the meantime, the driver just sweatdropped. "Seriously Ryoko...aren't we just a tad bit too much on robbing banks? They got a $$60 billion bounty on our heads! Just like Vash the Stampede!!" Tenchi wailed as he drove through the town. "Oh hush you...it's fun!" Ryoko said as she counted her money. "And drive more smoother!" Tenchi just sighed and rolled his eyes.  
  
"I demand you find my fiancee immediately!!" Ayeka screeched as she pounded the desk of her office. For a rich lady, she sure screamed a lot. "Do you hear me?!" Trunks, Kiyone, and Mihoshi gulped and nodded as they stood in front of Ayeka's desk. "Yes ma'am..." Trunks stammered, apparently afraid of the purple-haired aristocrat. "We'll find Tenchi and get him back." "You better...or else the next time you wake up in the morning, you're gonna find a certain trinket in your bed!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Now get out of here!" Ayeka screamed, pointing at the door. When the three police officers left, Trunks started mumbling under his breath about how much Ayeka was such a "friendly" person, with a lot of bad name-calling.  
  
"Now Trunks...calm down..." Mihoshi said, sweatdropping. "I'm sure she'll eventually get over her crankiness." Kiyone said. "Yes, but where the hell are we supposed to start if we don't even know where's they're going to hit next!" Trunks said. Suddenly, Sasami came bursting into the office holding a newspaper in her hand. She then threw it at them and sped on by. Trunks unfurled the paper and read the headlines: 'MOTHER-SON BANDIT DUO SOON TO ROB LINGERIE STORE WITH HOSTAGE'. "Well that's strange and obviously helpful." Mihoshi said. "To the lingerie store!" The purple-haired saiyajin announced, pointing in the direction where he thinks he knows where it is. "Uh huh...you're just excited because you wanna pick up some chicks." Kiyone rolled her eyes. "Do not!" Trunks defended himself from her accusation.  
  
"Right...whatever..." The three police officers got into the car and started to drive towards whatever lingerie store they could find. "Huh...I have a hunch they're at Victoria's Secret." Trunks said. "Wow, it's like you have psycho powers or something." Mihoshi observed. "Yep! I have ESPN!" Trunks said proudly. "...Ugh...and I had to get stuck with these two!" Kiyone muttered to herself. Just as they stopped at a red light, a car sped through the red light. "...What the!?" "Hey! It's the souvenir bandits!" Trunks said, accidentally smacking Kiyone in the face as he pointed at them. Mihoshi thwaped the purple-haired man across the head. "This isn't Fairly Odd Parents you know! It's Ryu, Ryoko, and their hostage Tenchi!"  
  
"Oh YEAH! Quick Kiyone, put on the flashy light and go after them!" Trunks said. And pretty soon, the three officers were in pursuit. "Hey, isn't that the fuzz??" Ryu asked, looking behind him. "Crap! They're after us now! Tenchi, feint maneuver number 8!" Ryoko ordered. "Feint what??" Tenchi asked in confusion. "...Oh never mind! Let me drive!" Ryoko pushed Tenchi out of the way and turned the wheel hard enough to make a 360 degree spin around and drove past the police. "Dammit! They used the trick I usually pull when I'm drag racing!" Trunks said angrily as they watched the thieves fly by. Mihoshi and Kiyone stared at him strangely. "...What?" Trunks asked.  
  
Ryoko laughed as she saw that the police officers weren't in sight. "HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! That was so easy!" Ryu started to open up the moneybags and sniff the money when suddenly they were being in pursuit again. "WHAT??? WHY THE HELL CAN'T THEY JUST GIVE UP ALREADY??" Kiyone pulled out a microphone and yelled at them. "You're under arrest! If you resist us, we'll have to take extreme measures!!" Ryu yelled back at them. "You can't make us!!" Kiyone growled and ordered Mihoshi and Trunks to start shooting at the car. "But, what if I hurt them?" She asked. "As long as you don't shoot them where the sun doesn't shine, who cares??" Kiyone growled. She then yelled again. "I said, you're under arrest! You better slow down or else!" No answer. "...Fine! They're getting what's coming to them!"  
  
Kiyone pushed Trunks to take the wheel as she brought out a huge bazooka gun out. "Now for the last time, you're under arrest! Don't make me use this!!" She yelled into the microphone Mihoshi was holding up for her. "Make us, ya fuzz!" Ryoko cackled back. "That's it!!" Kiyone shot the bazooka gun at them, causing a big missile to blow up the tires on the burglars' car, and they swerved wildly out of control. "EEE! We're heading towards that Victoria's Secret store!!" Tenchi screamed. "Cool! I mean, oh man we're gonna crash!" Ryu said, covering his face with his hands. "Duck, you damn fools!" Ryoko took her son and Tenchi down with her so they wouldn't hit the glass. CRASH!!! The women in the store screamed as the car crashed into the window and mowed down several displays of lingerie before it grounded to a stop.  
  
The three bandits slowly picked themselves up, rubbing their heads. "Ouch! My butt sure is gonna hurt after this...ooh, thongs!" Ryu picked up a lacy light blue thong and started playing with it. "Hey! It matches my hair! Look, ma!" Ryoko quickly grabbed the moneybags, an unconscious Tenchi, and dragged Ryu by his shirt out of the store with him still playing with the thong. "Hee hee! Man, I can see through it like glass..." he giggled. Ryoko rolled her eyes and took out a pistol from her belt. "Alright you scum! Give me a car, and you won't get hurt!" she sneered as she stood in the middle of the city square with lots of passerby. "Eek! It's Ryoko!" The people screamed, running for their lives. Pretty soon the square was deserted, making the tough woman sweatdrop.  
  
"Does anyone not put up with terrorists anymore??" She demanded. Ryu innocently looked up at his mother. "Ma, we're not terrorists...we're just old fashioned crime committing people. We don't do stuff like that." Ryoko blinked. 'Oh yeah..." "And besides, if you want to get those wimps' attention, ya gotta say it loud and proud." The teenager got up and put the thong over his head like a mask. "HEY YOU FREAKS!!! MY MOM AND I WILL BLOW UP THIS CITY IF YOU DON'T GIVE US A CAR TO GET AWAY IN!!!" Ryu yelled. Suddenly, Kiyone, Mihoshi, and Trunks came driving into the square. "YOU WON'T GET AWAY YOU TERRORISTS!!!" They yelled. "Oh sure! Way to keep our profile down, son! Now they think we're terrorists!" Ryoko snorted. Ryu blinked. "Uh oh...hold on...let me think of a plan...wait for it..." Tenchi, who had somehow miraculously recovered, held a light bulb over the teen's head. DING!  
  
"I got it!" The teenager took out a grenade shaped like a rubber ducky, only with a pin coming out of its butt. He pulled on the ring and threw the duck towards the police car. "Muahahaha! Eat lead ya pansies!!" Kiyone saw the duck coming and pushed her partners out of the line of fire. The duck landed in the car. "RUN YOU FOOLS!!!" She yelled. As if in slow motion, the three officers leapt away from the explosion just like Tom Cruise in 'Mission Impossible'. Or any other action movie I can't think of any names right now. They rolled on the ground and quickly stood up.  
  
"Dammit! Where did they go?!" Kiyone demanded, looking around. Seeing no one, she growled and threw Trunks into a wall nearby. "I think they got away, Kiyone." Mihoshi said. The blue-green haired woman dropped to her knew and yelled at the sky. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I COULD'VE GOTTEN A PROMOTION!!!!!!!!!!!! CURSE YOU, DUDLEY DO-RIGHT!!!!!" Mihoshi sweatdropped. "I think you mean, mother-son bandit duo." "...CURSE YOU, MOTHER-SON BANDIT DUO!!!!!!"  
  
In the meantime, Ryoko, Ryu, and Tenchi were sitting on a grassy hill and watching boats drift past on the waterfront. It was about evening, and the stars were out. "Man! That was fun! I hope we do that again tomorrow!" Ryu said happily. "I think you had enough fun for one week, son. We have to get back to the real world sometime too." Ryoko grinned, nudging the teen on his head. "Yeah, I know...but still...I wanna stay here...I like it here." He said. Tenchi gasped. "What? Why? Don't you want to come back to where everything is fun and crazy?" he asked. Ryu smiled and looked at the dark- haired man. "No. Not really. I have everything I always wanted to do here. Steal, destroy things...plus I get to piss off people."  
  
"Yeah, but this isn't real...its just part of your imagination...and besides, I think you've done everything on your list, eh?" Ryoko asked. Ryu looked at his list, noting that everything was checked off. "...Oh yeah, you're right." "So do you want to go home?" Tenchi asked. "...You can have this thong you stole as a souvenir." "...OOH! A thong! ...Hey! Wait a second! I'm not a pervert!" Ryu exclaimed. "Well, that settles it." The cyan-haired woman stood up and yelled at the sky. "Hey Washu! Hurry up and get us the hell outta here!" "Coming up, Ryoko! And would it kill you to say please?!" Washu voice drifted down. Back in the real world, Washu finally fixed up the machine and pressed cancel. Everyone was transported back, and landed in a heap. "WAAAAHHH!!! YOU SAID I COULD HAVE THE THONG!!!" Ryu wailed. "SHADDUP!!" They said, thwaping him across the head. 


	13. Ryu Gets Kidnapped

**Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko**

**Ch.13-Ryu Gets Kidnapped**

After their little adventure in the time /space continuum, Dr. Clay gets revenge on Washu by escaping GP headquarters and kidnapping Ryu. But it's not your average kidnap for revenge. Especially if your prisoner keeps talking and talking and talking…

"What? But I'm too lazy…" Ryu whined as he flopped down on the couch in the living room. "Ryu, the party's not just right without vodka, or sake." Ryoko said, lifting up the couch and dumping the teenager onto the floor. "Why can't you get it yourself, mother? You've got two feet too." Ryu snorted, brushing himself off. "Because I'm lazy…I mean, doing something else." Ryoko grinned toothily at her son as she phased off somewhere. Perhaps she was aiming for the bathroom, because Ryu heard Tenchi's screams from there. "My! Look how large you are Tenchi!" Her voice said. She then pretended to put on a perfect rendition of Tenchi's voice.

"Why, the better to screw you with, my dear." Ryu's eyes grew flat as he watched this all from the air. "…PERVERT!!!!" Ayeka screamed, kicking open the bathroom doors with a battering ram. "GET AWAY FROM TENCHI, YOU HO!!!" The teen's eyes widened when a naked Tenchi came flying over the balcony. "COME BACK AND MAKE LOVE TO ME TENCHI!!!" Ryoko screamed as she fought with Ayeka to fly after Tenchi. Ryu then heard a vase shattering against the door behind him. "SHUT UP YOU THREE!!!" Trunks yelled from inside the bedroom. "I'M TRYING TO LEARN!!" Mirai Ryoko giggled from the door, making Ryu sick to the stomach as he tried hard not to imagine what was going behind the doors. "…GAH!!! I CAN'T STAND EVERYONE'S PERVERTEDNESS TODAY!!!!" Ryu freaked out, finally flying down the stairs and out the door.

He looked around, and saw his groundhog snuffling around in the dirt. "Hey Mr. Fluffles, I need to go get alcohol for my drunk mom. Want to come with me?" He asked. Mr. Fluffles just chirped at him and jumped into his arms. Ryu grinned, and took off for the nearest town/city/village/whatever. In the nearest town/city/village/whatever, Ryu walked around looking for the best place to buy liquor for a tipsy parental unit. Finally, he stopped at a wine store and entered inside. "Good day sir. How may I help you?" The clerk asked. "Can I have two bottles of your best wine, plus a jug full of sake?" Ryu asked. "Yes you may." As the clerk started filling up the order, he looked down at the teen's feet. "Interesting pet. A 6 eyed groundhog, I'm guessing?"

"How'd you know?" The light-blue haired young man asked. "I collect a lot of unique pets whenever I'm traveling." The clerks smiled, giving him the goods. "That'll be 3000 yen." When Ryu came out of the store, he saw some chicks hanging out by the water fountain across the street. "Look Mr. Fluffles…those are what we call hoes. They dress weird, smoke, and sleep with other men for money. Remember to stay away from them." Mr. Fluffles responded by growling at the scanty women and opening his mouth, creating a vacuum-like suction. "No! Don't do that! You're not in Suikoden 2 where you eat people and spit them out and they recover miraculously!" Ryu said. Mr. Fluffles growled softly at the women again and followed his owner towards the chocolate store. He never got to the door.

In the meantime, things in the household just got crazier. Trunks was chasing after Ayeka and Ryoko with an axe, shouting something about ruining a good screw, while Tenchi was trying to get his dignity back by eating hot peppers and trying to forget what just happened a few moments earlier. Suddenly, Kiyone came through the door with a letter in her hand and Mihoshi right behind her. "Bad news everyone! Dr.Clay is out for revenge!" Washu then burst through the lab door, smacking Tenchi into the wall. "What!? Clay's free!? But how!?" She demanded. "Clay put some bait out to distract the guards and whatever else is out there... It looks like he's been planning this since he got into jail." Kiyone explained. "And look at this…" She held up the lacy light-blue thong for everyone to see. "WHAT!? My baby's been kidnapped by that bastard!?" Mirai Ryoko growled.

"Apparently. He told me he never goes out without his lucky thong to keep him company." Kiyone said. Mirai Ryoko snatched the thong out of her hands and wailed uncontrollably as she started snogging the lingerie. "What does Ryu have to do with Clay!? He wasn't even born during that time!" "Well the most logical thing to do is rescue our son." Trunks said after he thwacked Ayeka and Ryoko in the head with the axe. "…You're actually claiming Ryu as your son now!?" Mirai Ryoko demanded, pointing a finger at him. Trunks shrugged. "Hey, someone's gotta be the heir to the throne after me." He said. "Then it's settled! We'll go and rescue Ryu or bust!" Washu interrupted before a nasty name calling battle could stem out between them.

Meanwhile, in a big 'o ship shaped like a woman in space once again … "Hey what's cracking Dr. Clay? Chillin? Doing some lame-o science?" Ryu asked from the plastic tube he sat in naked. Except that his waist on down was covered in blue liquid. "…Shut up, I hate you and I want you dead." Clay growled. "Hey, that's fine with me, except I wasn't even born when my mom and her friends kicked your ass last time!" Ryu laughed at him. "Besides, why am I in a freaking tube?! I thought you were dead! What did you do, climb outta hell?" "No. I escaped the Galaxy Police Headquarters prison and came back to this ship I so carefully stowed away as part of my evil plans." Clay sneered. "…That means I must have some space ship stored somewhere in the universe…cool." Ryu said. "NO FOOLISH BOY! BAH! You don't know anything!" Clay started getting annoyed by the teen very easily. "Fine then…you know since you're so smart, can you determine whether my hi-po-thee-sis is correct? Ryu asked. "It's hypothesis!" Clay yelled. Ryu snorted. "Eh, whatever."


	14. It's A Rescue Mission!

**Tenchi Muyo! Son of Ryoko!**

**Ch.14-It's A Rescue Mission!**

After the Tenchi crew find out that Ryu has been kidnapped, they decide to go rescue him from the clutches of Dr. Clay. But he's handling things on his own when he's annoying the heck out of the evil man…

"…To outer space!" Washu commanded. Everyone jumped onto the Galaxy Police ship and blasted into outer space. But there was a traffic jam, and Kyone was beeping and honking at them. There was a mile long traffic jam of spaceships towards the exit of the Milky Way. "What's wrong?" Tenchi asked. "Some old lady is driving twenty under the speed limit with her blinker on!!" Kiyone said. "…GRR!!! That's it!! I can't stand it!!" Trunks grabbed the radio thingy and screamed into it. "YO!! THIS IS THE GALAXY POLICE!! MOVE YO BUSTED ASS VEHICLE!!" The old lady at the other far side of the line heard this and quickly moved out of the way. Finally, there were able to get through space.

Back on Dr. Clay's ship… "…Anyway! I was wondering that…if everything tastes like chicken, does Tasty Wheat taste like chicken? Mouse says it tastes like Tasty Wheat, and then what the heck does Tasty Wheat taste like? Where does it come from? Does it look like cornbread or wheat, I don't know. If it exists does it come in one of those boxes that look like they cleaned crap out of it?" (ONE HOUR LATER) "...So if Tasty Wheat has vitamins and minerals, as Tank's brother would say, where would it be…" **"**WHAT IS WITH YOU AND THIS STUPID THING!! IT'S FROM A MOVIE!!WHAT DO YOU EXPECT STUPID BOY!! URRRGHHHH!" "…Geez old man…chill out! I'll just do something to entertain you." Ryu scowled at the scientist. "If it's killing yourself that is something I'd love to see." Clay smirked back. "No....I'll say something you like.......like.......this time I'm gonna let it come out....this time I'm gonna stand up and shout....gonna do things MY WAY! Things MY WAY! MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY!!" Ryu yelled out at the top of his voice.

Clay let a yell and put his hands over his ears. "SHUT UP! I hate rock! Plus, I can't stand your horrible screeching!" "Hey! Like you could do any better....." Ryu muttered. 'Man, is this dude cheesy or what? What song would piss him off the most? …Hmmmm........ohhh.....now I know...' "HIT ME BABY TEN MORE TIMES!! Oh baby baby.....how was I supposed to know? That I was so butt ugly. Oh baby baby please wouldn't you like to know? That I am such a loser! Please sir, would you like to tell me.....that I'm phony stupid and a big fat buttkissar!! My loneliness.....is killing me (boo hoo!) I must confess I'm so ugly! OOgalee! I'm gonna say.....I'm a big teeny bopper-don't gimme a sign!!! Just HIT ME BABY TEN MORE TIMES!!"

"AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! STOP IT! I can't stand hearing you hooligans singing that song all wrong!! It goes like this for Kami's sake! …HIT BE BABY ONE MORE TIME!! Oh baby baby....how was I supposed to know...that-well I forget those lines....my loneliness is killing me (yeah yeah) I must confess I still believe (still believe)." "SHUT UP! That song makes me sick!!" Ryu yelled. "You brought up my favorite song anyways!" Clay said. "You're such a lame ass!!" '...Oh my Kami! …Gotta spread the word that Clay's fave singer is the worst diva-teeny bopper that ever lived!!' The teen thought.

Then suddenly, CRASH!! Tenchi, Ryoko, Ayeka, Washu and Trunks blasted through the door. "Yo guys!" Ryu greeted as he waved from inside the plastic container he was held in. "Ryu!" Tenchi gasped. "Ryu!" Ayeka gasped. "Ryu!" Washu gasped. "Ryu!" Trunks gasped. "RYU! That pervert got you all naked!" Ryoko wailed. They all stared at her and sweat dropped in embarrassment. "What's up with all the gasps? Anyway, guess what dirt I dug up! Clay kidnapped me for revenge on you Ma! And his fave singer is the biggest dirty teeny bopper that ever lived!" Ryu called out. They all sweatdropped and face-faulted onto the ground.


End file.
